honesty hour

Processed with VSCOcam with f3 preset Processed with VSCOcam with t1 presetalright, honesty hour. and i mean complete honesty.

the past two years have been such confusing years. i’ve had some of the highest points of my life, and also some of the toughest struggles.

high points:

– making wonderful covenants with the Lord in the temple

– figuring out my career (hopefully for the last time)

– making wonderful friends

low points:

– being single for over two years and having very few options (i can count the amount of dates i’ve been on in the past two years with one hand)

– plus, as of now all of my exes are in serious committed relationships (engaged/married)

– having some of the biggest spiritual struggles of my life and doubting answers that i received and was once so sure of

– increased anxiety and stress regarding my future

– some intense loneliness and nostalgia for school and my friends from there

part of the reason i haven’t blogged much in the past two years is because i felt like i don’t know anything.  i feel like if my past relationships haven’t worked, then something must be wrong with me. it’s crazy and untrue.  i mistook “realism” for “cynicism” especially when it comes to how i view myself.  but i’m done with that.  i also thought that i shouldn’t accept that i care a lot about finding love; romance shouldn’t be in the top of my priorities, but it is. i’m a romantic.

so, i’m back to blogging.  i’m back to being a “realistically-hopeful-romantic”.

be on the look-out for more “dear future husband” letters.

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xolesliejane

lover of art, travel, fashion, love, music, books, design

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