honesty hour

Processed with VSCOcam with f3 preset Processed with VSCOcam with t1 presetalright, honesty hour. and i mean complete honesty.

the past two years have been such confusing years. i’ve had some of the highest points of my life, and also some of the toughest struggles.

high points:

– making wonderful covenants with the Lord in the temple

– figuring out my career (hopefully for the last time)

– making wonderful friends

low points:

– being single for over two years and having very few options (i can count the amount of dates i’ve been on in the past two years with one hand)

– plus, as of now all of my exes are in serious committed relationships (engaged/married)

– having some of the biggest spiritual struggles of my life and doubting answers that i received and was once so sure of

– increased anxiety and stress regarding my future

– some intense loneliness and nostalgia for school and my friends from there

part of the reason i haven’t blogged much in the past two years is because i felt like i don’t know anything.  i feel like if my past relationships haven’t worked, then something must be wrong with me. it’s crazy and untrue.  i mistook “realism” for “cynicism” especially when it comes to how i view myself.  but i’m done with that.  i also thought that i shouldn’t accept that i care a lot about finding love; romance shouldn’t be in the top of my priorities, but it is. i’m a romantic.

so, i’m back to blogging.  i’m back to being a “realistically-hopeful-romantic”.

be on the look-out for more “dear future husband” letters.

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voting, water, skyfall and busted metro systems

here’s my week in a list.

1. voting – on tuesday, like the majority of Americans i went to the polling station, stood in line and waited to make my voice heard.  i got a little teary-eyed when i thought about those who fought for the vote for all.  if you are a fan of women’s suffrage and/or lady gaga [you know i am], then you’ll love the video below.

2. water – this week i completed week 1 of the weekly wellness challenge.  i didn’t see a lot of differences in my wellness, besides being thirstier and having to use the lady’s room a little more than usual. this next week is going to be a real challenge. getting to bed early is hard for me, especially when there are so many things to watch on netflix.

3. art in the city – saturday i was supposed to meet my boss for an artist lecture at the national gallery. i didn’t want to fuss with parking, so i opted to take the metro. there was crazy construction on the metro line. long story short, i was an hour late for the lecture, so i decided to just skip and go to the hirshorn museum. i saw the exhibit of ai weiwei [a favorite of mine], clyfford still [a new favorite], and other fantastic artists, all of who i studied in school [think francis bacon and calder]. it was such a fantastic museum outing. huzzah for city living!

4. skyfall – like the majority of women, i have a weakness for men in suits, especially suits made by the exquisite tom ford. men of the world, tom for is who should be styling you.

i mean, come on. a well dressed man, sitting in the national gallery, staring at a turner. be still my heart.

and, like the majority of humans, i love a good action flick. and i love the new bond series.  daniel craig is a great bond. and eve was awesome as a bond girl  woman.  the plot was great.  the cinematography was great.  the action was great. the cars were great. in summation, everything about this movie was great. strike that, for about twenty minutes i was wondering why on earth anyone would let his keep that terrible fuzz beard.  thank goodness eve helped him shave it off.  it was seriously killing the mood.

 

 

the update on leslie

highlights of 2011:

– sister got married

– best friends got engaged

– went to florida and saw my first gators

highlights of 2012:

– graduated from college

– internship at national portrait gallery

– got a job as an interior designer’s project manager

– best friends [sm and jk] got married

– fell in love, and fell out of love

– cut off my hair

– got a puppy [morrie]

classic leslie

the other day a cute guy started talking to me on the metro. keep in mind it was packed, and REALLY hot, therefore, i was sweating like crazy.

man: it’s hot in here.
me: yeah, too hot.
man: i wish they’d let me wear shorts to work.
me: i don’t get how you guys can wear suits.  i’d die. i mean, look at me! i’m sweating like a pig, and i’m in a skirt!
man: ….

moral of the story: i’m awkward, but one day, someone will find my awkwardness endearing.  until then, i’ll keep channeling liz lemon. [“blamo! another successful interaction with a man!”]

dear future husband:

i am no stranger to heartache.  i’ve been dumped [multiple times], and i’ve had to be the one who ends things. some times it really sucks. sometimes it’s better.

in all my failed relationships, i have learned a lot.

– if you care enough about a person, you will make it work. no matter what.  this means that when things get scary or get tough, you stick it out.  you iron out the creases.

– don’t let the little things add up to big deals.  yes, i would prefer it if you did everything i wanted you to, whenever i wanted it, but that’s unrealistic.  so i’ll forgive you for those small things if you agree to forgive me.

– relationships are unique.  don’t compare the one you’re currently in to any other relationship [you’re past ones, your friends’ or your parents’].  relationships move at different paces and are expressed in different ways.

– when they end, they end.  sometimes the end makes you feel like you are going to throw up and never breathe normally again.  sometimes, you’re at peace with it.  whatever the ending, things move on.  you heal.  don’t let the possibility of heartbreak destroy your hope in dating.

– in general, don’t let your fears of anything get in the way.  fear is the opposite of faith.  you should go into all your relationships with faith.

– remember that you are worth it. you are a great, amazing person.  self-respect is key to a healthy relationship.

x leslie